I’m not ok.
I heard the news after I came back from baseball with my sons. Three fallen police officers, Mounties, killed by some kid with a hate-on for cops. Two more in the hospital. A whole community threatened (still threatened as I write this…)
I responded like anyone would. Shock, but then relief that it wasn’t anyone we knew. Then gratitude for the life my family has, tossed in with some serious denial that this could ever happen to my husband. Then I thought I was “good to go”. I thought it was ok to watch the news, ok to wait for updates, ok to tuck my kids into bed, and to finally go to sleep.
But I didn’t want to sleep. I watched the news. I saw the unnecessary image of an officer’s blood on the pavement. I watched grown men cry, giving news briefs, heartbroken. I read Facebook – saw the good, the bad and the ignorant. I waited for the shooter to be caught. I sent a message to my husband, who was working the night shift…
This is terrible
Yes, it is
Be safe tonight.
I’ll be fine, now sleep.
That’s all he could say. Probably because he was too sick and distracted, maybe terrified to say anything else. Later he would say he “felt numb”. Because he’s not a super-hero. He’s not a robot. He’s a Dad. He’s a husband. He has his fears and doubts about things, just like the rest of us. And he had to push this terrible event out of his mind to get back to cleaning up the streets in our town, so far away from this tragedy, but still too close. Back to taking statements…and looking over his shoulder.
And I didn’t think I would sleep. But I did, and when I woke up in the morning, I scrambled for my phone to see if they had caught the shooter.
They didn’t. They haven’t. Instead, they are sending more officers in to find him. Sending more mothers and fathers, sisters, brothers, daughters and sons, to stop this guy. One unstable guy with no respect for life.
I am not OK. None of us should be OK. This is insanity! Not just this one crazy guy with guns, but all of the crazy people with guns! And the terrible, fear-mongering, bull-shit attitudes that people have toward law enforcement officers! I am SO SICK of the stuff I read and hear about police officers being “power-hungry, power-tripping, too dumb to get any other job, gun-happy, muscle-headed, donut-eating, uncaring…”. The list goes on.
Everyone needs to stop now and really think. Stop teaching your kids that police officers are the bad guys who give you tickets you “don’t deserve”. Stop assuming that you know every person who wears a uniform, or that they are all alike. Because you don’t, and they’re not. Stop giving officers flack when you see them breaking for lunch or a coffee. That’s bullying.
Let’s stop making it ok for our kids to play hours of violent video games. Send your little boys and girls outside to build something, ride a bike, to make friends, play kick-the-can. Teach them to talk, read, volunteer, socialize.
Take their damn phones away from them once in a while.
Our v-idiot society is breeding a bunch of ignorant, narcissistic, anti-social, desensitized people.
I remember when I was a kid, we were taught to respect authority, and to NEVER EVER pretend to “shoot” someone with our fingers. We were allowed to play with water guns and bb guns, but we knew we could never point them at each others heads, never point them at someone who wasn’t playing. My Dad had guns. He was a hunter. But he didn’t glorify killing. He didn’t obsess about his guns. We respected how dangerous they were.
And I was taught that you only needed to be afraid of the police if you were breaking the law. And as far as I am concerned, this is still the case.
If you are such a simpleton or a snob that you think you can make some broad-sweeping assumption about what kind of man or woman is behind that police badge, you scare me more than anyone. Open that closed mind.
And now, because someone decided he hates cops so much that he would walk into a quiet neighborhood, and bait them into a gunfight, three human beings are dead. Two more are injured. Families are destroyed. Family these fallen loved. Family who love them. Family who depended on them to be at ball games, birthdays, ballet recitals and grads. Family who depended on them to “watch their six”. And out there somewhere is a cop-hater, who has been free to debase and hate cops openly. Maybe he has a mental illness, or maybe he was victimized by someone in a position of power. I don’t know who he is, or why he did it. What I do know, is he has targeted a group of people I have the utmost respect for, and one whom I love very much. So until this guy is found, until bullying like this is stopped, I’m not ok.
To the families, friends of the fallen officers, and to the members of the NB RCMP, my deepest condolences. My prayers and thoughts are with you all.